Dear Pasadena

sitting in Mcdonalds in Pasadena where i grew up; thinking about how far i have come and the idea comes to my mind: images of damage and fake tragedies. The reason i say this is because i hated pasadena for so long because i felt it was nothing but trouble: I had the worst relationships , the worst haters... i even got jumped all surrounding a guy. deeply rooted issue that cause a traumatic reaction to this beautiful city called pasadena. But does the city deserve such blame? Had i chosen better friends maybe i wouldn't be so hurt? Or maybe if i never ran away from home i'd be ok ? Not so, i was a broken girl searching for purpose and Daddy love... in my eyes any love. It seems as if danger and false humility were answers to my cries a lot faster than God or even a true friend. I would not change my experience for anything in the world, because it grew me into the woman i am today. Dealing with people who just walked all over me , used me for money , and to clear an erection has taught me that i had no self value and no ideal that there was already someone who knew me and loved me just the way i was... broken and lost. That person died on the cross for me many years ago: Jesus Christ He allowed me to experience no parents , bad relationships, and horrible focus in school so that i could be a testament to what God can do. If you see me Now: i am nothing close to what i use to be. I know my worth , that of a queen . I no longer shall allow other people to project there perception on me ;nor accept the empty words that means nothing. In 1 Corinthians 10:5 it says to cast down every thought that projects its self against the knowledge of christ . so i shall not let my past mistakes hold me back or sit dormant in my mind. Because what so ever a man thinks so he is . i not only think but i know that i am Gods' chosen daughter called to do great things and i will accept nothing less. And you can change cities all you want but it means nothing if your still the same ole you. So i tell the Devil and the flesh: no more you shall no longer have rule over me...... And i thank every pass headache for allowing me to grow. No, a bomb did not drop and there is no tragedy because i am whole & safe in the masters arms never defeated

..... As i sit in Mcdonalds in pasadena i smile and simply say its time to reinvent my perspective on this beautiful city.